Waiting

Dear Son,

We are all set up in the hospital right now! Just waiting for some progress for you to make your appearance!
This morning was hectic. I wanted to spend the morning with your daddy just having a slow morning, enjoying each other, but instead I had to work and try and wrap up some orders right up until the minute we had to leave. That was not ideal, but now we have all the time in the world together. The nurses said it could be 16 hours before active labor even begins, and then from there who knows how long. So we are just camped out waiting for you!
I have loved having you grow in my womb for the past 9 months. It has already been a joy to be your Mommy. I was only sick twice in one day, and that was at 5 weeks of pregnancy. Never again since then! I really have felt good the whole time.
For the past 4-5 months, my feet have been very swollen, but that is not bad to deal with. I've had heartburn off and on, and the doctor has been concerned with my blood pressure being too high, but none of those things were really ever painful.
Lately, it's been harder to sleep. I have to sleep on my side to keep a good blood flow to you, so I rotate between my two sides through the night, and really, that's been the most painful, that I wake up with sore hips. They ache and I end up sitting up for a bit to give them some relief. You're just getting so big, and you're ready to come, so my body is accomodating your big boy size.  :)
People always warned me early in my pregnancy that being full term pregnant in the dead of summer was going to be miserable. It wasn't that bad! I just stayed inside all that I could. I stopped photographing sessions outdoors the last weekend in June, and that was definitely a good choice! So I didn't have any sessions in July and of all the months in the year to sit out photographing in the heat, July was a good choice for you to arrive!
I can't believe you actually are going to be a July baby. Your due date was August 11th, and with you being my first baby, I always thought you would even come after the 11th, since most 1st babies tend to do that. But because of my high blood pressure, my doctor was worried about my body keeping up with your growing body, so we are inducing 2 weeks early today. I am exactly 38 weeks along today. I'm so happy we get to meet you 2 weeks early! I would much rather that than keep your sweet face from us any longer!
Though really, looking back, I can't believe I am done being pregnant. There were months where it felt like FOREVER until you were going to arrive, but now, of course looking back, it all went by in a flash. The 2nd trimester, this past spring, that was the longest feeling time of waiting. Because then I still had 4-5 months to go until you arrived, and we already knew you are a boy, so that big event of pregnancy had passed us, but I was still 2-3 months out from having any baby showers, or other big events to celebrate your arrival, so it really just drug by and seemed like you were never going to get here!
We've been so excited these past 9 months and at times, were counting down day to day until your arrival.
We have been so blessed with so many friends and family who helped us celebrate your coming. We had two wonderful showers where they spoiled you with so many goodies! In addition to that, I've had so many friends just donate things to us that they no longer needed for their children, that we could use for you. So many people are happy for your Daddy and me that you are coming in to our lives. I know right now, with us in the hospital, so many are praying for us, for your safe and healthy arrival.
We've waited for you for a long time. Driving up to the hospital today, it was surreal. The fact that we've been praying for you for 5 1/2 years, often times believing that you would never come in to our lives, and now here we are, all set up, waiting for you to arrive any hour. It's so very hard to feel like this is real. I'm sure it won't even seem real until we meet you face to face. A moment I've dreamed of for years, and just the thought of it now makes me tear up.
The past couple months have been hard to focus at work. I would just go and stand or sit in your nursery when I had things waiting for me at work. I would look around your room, pack and re-pack your diaper bag for the hospital, fold and re-fold all of your clothes in your drawers, go through your things making sure we have everything we need for you, and just bask in the moment of anticipation of you. Even if I had no reason at all to go in your room, or if I was walking to another room in the house, I'd still just go in there and either just stand and look around, or I'd find something to do in there. It was the place where I could physically go that surrounded me with things of you.
I loved doing all the laundry and washing all of your clothes, blankets, towels, everything, (you already have a lot of belongings!)! Then getting to fold all of the little things and find a place for them. To think we were going to have a real live baby soon who got to wear and use those items always amazed me.
I had a lot of fun putting your nursery together! Daddy put the crib together, and Grampa painted every other piece of furniture in your room! (Your bookcase, dresser/changing table, rocking chair/foot stool, and toy box). Meme helped me design your curtains and she made them all by herself! I had fun picking out your bedding and all of the decor. It all came together more beautiful than I could have imagined. (I'll share pictures on here later!) Daddy and I joke that we have so many baseball items in your room (because Daddy loves baseball) that you're bound to grow up hating it! Ha!  Of course we hope not! You've already been to 4 Rangers games! (this year, in my tummy!)
**Breaking news!!! The nurse just came in and said that I'm having contractions.... even though I don't feel a thing!! (yes, it's very early and I'm only dilated to a 1... I know, we have a long way to go!) But that was still fun to hear!    :)
All I can feel right now is you moving around!
That of course has been my favorite part of being pregnant with you. I first felt you move when I was 18 weeks pregnant. You gave one little kick from the inside and it took me a second to realize that it was indeed you and not my imagination! Then for a couple weeks after that, you just gave little kicks here and there. Then one day, the ROLLS started! You'd poke one limb out (never could tell if it was a hand/foot/elbow/knee/etc) and hold it out as you moved it across my stomach. Your Daddy and I would just sit and stare at my tummy and watch your acrobatics! My tummy would shake and stretch and look like something was alive in there trying to come out! Go figure! It was amazing! Every time you'd move, it would always catch my attention, and whatever I was doing was put on hold until you settled down. Oh, and the hiccups! One day I noticed that my stomach had a little shake consistently, every couple of seconds. At first I just thought you were moving/kicking consistently, but then realized that it was probably your hiccups, since the movements were so light and subtle. You would have the hiccups at least once a day. That was always such a strange thought that you, this little person I've never met, so small inside of my body, was capable of having the hiccups! You are a marvel. (I know every baby has the hiccups, but you are a marvel to me.)
You have really made this such an easy pregnancy. So enjoyable. We took lots of pictures of my tummy while you were in there. I want to remember this time forever. I know we're going to have so much more fun with you outside of my womb, but these first months of getting to know each other through my womb have been so special.
Daddy and I love you so much.
The thought that we will get to meet you in a matter of hours is overwhelming. The love is already overwhelming. I'm sure when I actually see your face, my heart will burst!
I love you baby boy. You are already the joy in our lives.

Love,
  Mommy